In prior posts, I have contemplated my post-babyloss identity. Today, inspired by Carly-Marie’s Link-Up post on Still Standing, here are 10 things about who I am apart from a grieving, babyloss mama.
1. What is your favorite food?
Chocolate chip pancakes. When we first moved to Chicago, we went out to breakfast the next morning because all our dishwear was in boxes and we had no groceries. I discovered that the place around the corner had the best chocolate chip pancakes I’d ever tasted. K posted on FB with this picture and comment: “Chocolate chip pancakes two blocks from the new place! I think we’re going to be OK here.”
2. What are you reading right now?
I’m always reading several books. Ironically, I could never do that when I was younger. I’m usually reading a young adult book, a nonfiction book, and a literary fiction book. Since I just finished the Divergent trilogy, I’m just reading nonfiction (Sara Miles’s “Take This Bread”) and lit fiction (“Gone Girl.”) Previously it was “Zealot” by Reza Aslan and “1Q84” by Haruki Murakami. I gravitate towards religious/theological nonfiction and either bestsellers or books by authors I enjoy (“Cloud Atlas” and something by Ann Patchett are in the wings, since I recently finished and enjoyed her “State of Wonder.”) I should clarify that one of the books I’m “reading” is always an audiobook that I listen to on my (40-minute) walk to work.
3. Favorite movie?
I like documentaries / movies based on true stories the best. Among my favorites are “Whale Rider,” “Rabbit-Proof Fence,” “Jesus Camp” and “For the Bible Tells Me So.” I also watch a bunch of silly, female-centric flicks like “Stick It” and “Pitch Perfect” and romcoms like “Love, Actually.” The first movies I owned were “Twister” with Helen Hunt and “Zorro” with Antonio Banderas.
4. Your favorite book?
“The Power of One” by Bryce Courtenay. Followed by the “Ender’s Game” series by Orson Scott Card. And book 4 of “Harry Potter.”
5. Sweet or Savory?
Sweet. See chocolate chip pancakes above :). I don’t think savory foods belong with breakfast or dessert! I’m not a salty person either – I don’t like potato chips and am really picky about sushi because I find seaweed way too salty.
6. Where have you traveled to?
In the U.S., nearly every state thanks to playing rugby on a national level. Most traveled cities include San Francisco, New York, Philadelphia, Raleigh, DC (okay, I lived there for over a decade), Chicago (live there now!), Dallas, Austin and Denver. Favorite National Parks and scenic locales include Yosemite, Arches, Canyonlands, Zion, the Grand Canyon, Lake Powell, Great Falls (VA/MD) and the Bahamas. Internationally, I’ve been to England, Scotland, Iceland, the Netherlands, Italy, France, Spain, Mexico, Austria, Switzerland, Germany and Belgium (thanks, studying abroad!). There are so many places I’d still like to go!
7. Any bad habits?
Shamefully, biting my nails. I have since I was a child. When I told my therapist I wanted to stop, as part of my anxiety control “plan,” she asked me “Why? Are you hurting anyone? Does it help you control your anxiety?” So… I still bite my nails. I also pick at dry skin on my lips and I love peeling sunburns (though I DO try to prevent them at all costs).
8. What is your perfect idea of a night in?
I don’t know if it’s “perfect,” but most of my nights look like this, and I am pretty content with them: Get home from the gym. Pour a glass of sauvignon blanc and go up to the roof garden with K to water the plants and sit and sip (may include cheese and crackers). Watch sunset. Go inside to make dinner. Eat dinner while watching TV (a “Daily Show” rerun, Anthony Bourdain, something like that). Knit while watching the next episode in our current series (right now, “The Good Wife”). Walk to Forever Yogurt for dessert. Walk home, get ready for bed, pile up in bed and read aloud from our current young adult series book until around 10:45; go to sleep.
9. What have you been procrastinating on?
Cleaning things that are a pain to clean, like the baseboards, the inside of the refrigerator/freezer, the outside of the windows, etc.
Knitting. Cycling to and around the zoo. Walking at the arboretum and the botanic gardens. Roller skating. Figure skating. Yoga. Writing on my blogs. And remembering and reflecting on all the ways that I am Still Standing in memory of Anderson.