An early Thanksgiving

Since yesterday afternoon, pretty much everything that could go wrong, has. Yet for some reason, while I was all teary about it yesterday, I truly woke up in a better frame of mind today. I’m not sure why, but I’m calling it my early Thanksgiving.

First, I got my period. It was three days late, so I had started to get really hopeful that I was pregnant. No luck.

But… at least I don’t have cramps or pain, the period seems normal, and the fact that it’s late means we will be home from our Thanksgiving travels and therefore won’t miss the next IUI cycle. Plus, a friend of mine is around a month pregnant. At first, I was bummed that I wouldn’t be pregnant with her, but then I remembered: I’m being induced a month early next time! We could still give birth at the same time! Some hope is hard to kill.

Second, as soon as I got on the bus home, I realized I had left my phone at work.

But… I had my work phone with me, so I had a backup. I texted K and my mom, who are the only people who call me anyway. I still had access to all my email. So no real problems there, only that it was annoying and I missed playing Candy Crush Saga and listening to my book on tape.

Third, I was looking forward to a special “relaxation day” at my gym. They had candlelight yoga! Yay! Boy, did I need to relax. In reality though, the class was terrible. It was overcrowded, the lights were not dark enough to even see the candles, and since it was a novelty, most attendees were brand new to yoga. That meant folks coming in late, stepping over people, asking meditating folks to move over, giggling, laughing, whispering during savasana. The instructor was hard to hear, and impossible to see. I admit, I was not feeling yog-ish after that – I was feeling pretty grumpy and uncharitable, in fact.

But… I got a lot of stretching in that I needed to do anyway due to my pelvic muscle spasm. So two birds with one stone, and all. And at least I went to the gym? Poor K has a nasty cold and had to stay home.

Fourth, our furnace went on the fritz for the second time in two days. This is a problem because this morning it was 13 degrees with a windchill of 6 below.

But… we have a 24/7 repair service in our area. They were able to come between 8 and noon this morning, which is exactly the day and time K works from home (plus, as mentioned, she wasn’t feeling well so was planning on staying home anyway). Our landlord paid promptly for the repairs. We have a fireplace and a space heater and the best gift K got me last year for Christmas: an electric blanket. Last night, we piled in bed at 8:15 to read and chat and stay cozy under all the warmth. The furnace was repaired on time, and the maintenance guy gave K his personal cell so that she could call him directly the next time, in case it was a problem he could talk her through. Yes, we’re writing them an excellent Yelp and BBB review. The company is Four Seasons, for you Chicagolanders. Consider this my plug!

Fifth, this morning I dragged myself out of my cozy electric blanket bed into the furnaceless house (it wasn’t repaired until 9:30 a.m.; I know I’m giving a confusing timeline!). I thought I would be nice and start a fire so that it would be warmer when K got up. But… I didn’t realize the flue was closed, and smoke started pouring into the house. I rushed back into the bedroom and had to wake K up to learn how to open it (you can tell I’m not the primary fire-starter in the house, which is natural because K can bust a fire with a rope and a stick. True story.).

But… I reached up and opened the flue on my own, so K didn’t have to get out of bed, at least. I opened windows, and the smoke alarm didn’t go off, which is good because I can’t even reach it on a step-stool, so I would have had to make K get up to shut it off. Crisis averted!

Sixth, the cat puked up all his breakfast.

But… at least it was on the wood floor and not the carpet! So much easier to clean, and no staining. And it was just because he ate too quickly.

Seventh, because of the fire and the cat, I missed the early bus. Then, the next bus was so full that they only let on one person before shutting the door (there were probably around 8 people at my stop, including one woman who was waiting there longer than I was – around 15+ minutes. Did I mention it was 6 below?).

But… another bus came 5 or so minutes later, and it was warm, and had plenty of seats. I was dressed appropriately, so I didn’t freeze while I waited (even though I couldn’t find my glove liners. My mittens are better than I thought!). My first work meeting wasn’t until 10:30, so I wasn’t too worried. In fact, I treated myself to an egg and cheddar square at Potbelly (no time for breakfast at home; see previous paragraph), a second cup of coffee (a not-pregnant bonus!), and an oatmeal chocolate chip cookie (because they are delicious and I was proud of myself for being so positive). And hey, at least I wasn’t on this bus.

Even though today started off on the wrong foot, I’m feeling hopeful. I feel like – I can do this. I can be patient. I can wait. I can be positive. And since I’m not pregnant, I can go indoor skydiving for my birthday on Sunday. Happy Thanksgiving!

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11 Responses to An early Thanksgiving

  1. J says:

    I do have to admit I’m jealous that you only had to wait 5 minutes after missing a bus–if I miss the bus, I have to wait 45 minutes!

  2. kaitlynva says:

    Happy Birthday!! I’m glad you got your furnace fixed and were not on a flaming bus. I’m sorry about all the other crap :-/

  3. meghanoc says:

    This is the most amazing post! They (who is “they” anyways?) say gratitude helps us through grief and this is the most perfect example. so many sucky things, and look at you thinking of things to be grateful for. so so very impressed. especially with the first one- ttc after loss is so darn hard and finding a silver lining around getting your period is a beautiful thing.

    • meghanoc says:

      also- our furnace is on the fritz too! aside form the cold, it’s easy to complain about the huge unexpected cost of replacing ours- but you remind me that I’m fortunate to have a home and be able to fix it so i will have heat. not all are so fortunate.

      • babylossmama says:

        I think it helped me to realize this too – on Sunday night, we learned about our church’s food pantry and weekly homeless shelter – and both reminded me how lucky I am not to have to move from church to church every night in the winter to stay warm, only to be turned out to the elements every morning by 7 a.m.

  4. meghanoc says:

    Reblogged this on Expecting the Unexpected and commented:
    We are told that finding things to be grateful helps us move through our grief. I’ve experimented with this- practicing it while I was still pregnant (being grateful for merely having the experience of pregnancy, even though my baby would likely die) and after my baby died, by taking two weeks and recognizing publicly three things each day that were good. Here is a post by another babyloss mom who frankly had a pretty crappy day. Most things are not specifically related to loss, but when I have a crappy day, I often think “if I had a baby, I wouldn’t care so much.” So when one of my fellow babyloss moms was abel to put her crummy day in perspective, I was impressed and inspired.

  5. Michele says:

    You have an incredible perspective. I am definitely inspired by you to be a little less bitter and cynical going into this holiday season. I woke up today and felt like nothing was ever going to go right ever again, but I’m going to practice being grateful even if it drives me insane.

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