Tag Archives: #grief

Jewelry, grief and a poem

When Ander died, I was given three lovely, wonderful necklaces. One has his footprints stamped into it (his actual footprints, from a picture!) and his name and birthdate on the back; my mom got K and I each one from … Continue reading

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Grief, 18 months on

Grief, 18 months after my son’s death, is so much less sharp than it was before that at times I feel guilty. I still think of him every day, and likely always will, but the edges have blunted tremendously. I … Continue reading

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What to say, what not to say

I’m sure I’ve posted on this before, but as I can never find these lists when I need them, it bears repeating (if indeed I even am). For your archiving pleasure: “The Complete List of Do’s and Don’ts When Supporting … Continue reading

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“Men Have Miscarriages, Too”

There are many articles on coping with grief after the loss of a baby. These are usually targeted at the mother, as are support groups both online and in person. But there are now fairly ample resources for men and … Continue reading

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The church and trauma

God and the church are touchy subjects in the babyloss community (really, in every community, amirite?). I bristle whenever I hear someone trying to make themselves feel better by telling a babyloss mom that “It was God’s will” or “God … Continue reading

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Different anchors, different oceans

Mary Tyler Mom, one of my favorite Chicago local bloggers, has needed anchors a lot in her life – during her daughter Donna’s cancer and after Donna died, and now, helping her elderly father as he suffers declining physical and mental … Continue reading

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Friends who understand

A glorious post by Robyna May about the difference between two types of friends after loss: those who don’t understand, and those who do. An excerpt is below. A friend says, “he was beautiful”.  A friend who understands says “he … Continue reading

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This time around, or, now

Before: I tried to rein in my hopes. When we were first trying to conceive Ander, I was the killjoy, the “remember our odds are only 25% each time,” the “we’ll see.” For the first ten weeks, I was the … Continue reading

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Two extremes

I just returned from a nearly three week vacation to the East Coast, so I’m both behind on posting and yet have so much I want to share with you all, about Ander’s memorial service, about how I’m working on … Continue reading

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10 (Non-grief) things about me

In prior posts, I have contemplated my post-babyloss identity. Today, inspired by Carly-Marie’s Link-Up post on Still Standing, here are 10 things about who I am apart from a grieving, babyloss mama. 1. What is your favorite food? Chocolate chip … Continue reading

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