When you’re on hospital bed rest, it’s hard not to be able to control what you eat as you did before. My baby got organic milk and dairy, and nothing from the “dirty dozen.” Now I’m fed non-organic grapes, Red Delicious apples, canned pineapple. It’s hard to feel like you’re simultaneously doing something really good for your baby (hospital bed rest) while also compromising on all the other “good things” you thought you were doing before. It’s also hard not to be able to control as well when you eat and what. The first few days I was in the hospital, I got a set menu, which wasn’t necessarily the best for an antepartum mom – for example, coffee with every meal. Even though they look out for you, you have to also make choices that are in your best interest. At first I felt bad at wasting food, but there’s no way I could eat meat in the morning (nausea), so all those sausage patties remained untouched as I longed for cereal and yogurt. When I became a “regular,” I could peruse the menu with a better eye to what I’d actually eat – though it’s still weird to me that if I wanted to, I could have eaten donuts and brownies and pizza every day, basically, and I don’t know if anyone would know the difference. I hadn’t even been weighed since my intake (several days), which was also odd to me since I hadn’t gained nearly enough. I guess the baby was fine and growing well, so they didn’t mind as much that I’m wasn’t – though I kept trying to tell myself it was all muscle weight that was losing (which isn’t good for me, personally, but better than thinking you’re not eating enough to fuel your little one).